A Rant

A few things that need to stop immediately are:

1) The fucking oil well pumping out millions of gallons into the Gulf.
Or are we going to get a scarlet letter and end up with a moat of oil surrounding the country? How perfect would that be? Seriously, plug it up or I am grabbing Sean Penn and a snorkel and going down there myself.

2) Also, don't bark about how your seafood prices are going to go up or how your vacation to New Orleans or the Gulf Coast is going to be ruined. If that's how your really feel, just keep it to yourself. It's not winning points for you. It's kind of like saying the Holocaust limited your chances of finding a good accountant or a good Reuben.

and on to lighter requests

3) People saying "Really?!" in a very sarcastic manner.
Unless you are Seth Meyers, Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, Tina Fey, or Tina Fey it makes you sound awful. Also makes you sound very white.


4) Posting an 80s lyric on your Facebook status.
It is probably ok if that person dies and it's an homage, but if not, keep posting about your cute children or what the weather is like.


5) Becoming a fan of everything you can on Facebook.
Don't you know that Facebook is SkyNet?



6) What Would Jesus Do Spinoffs.
Also not funny. Maybe it was funny for a while, but the joke is as played out as any OJ Simpson or Michael Jackson-laden monologue from some hackneyed comedian.